Dark Embrace

The mind works in mysterious ways
You can be asleep and yet be wide awake
Your subconscious coming alive
As your consciousness ebbs away
My subconscious doesn't seem to like me
She tells me time and time again
How much it word be her joy
To rip me apart
Destroy my body
Kill me
Every night as I drift into the dark abyss of sleep
She rears her head
Takes over my mind and body
Pushing me urging me to annihilate myself
This night however is different
Tonight I try to fight back
But the mind is weak
The subconscious is more powerful than we can ever imagine
She walks me to the kitchen
It looks rather ominous at night
Akin to an unfamiliar territory
But subconsciously I can navigate it with ease
Curse that subconscious bitch
I am forced to approach my set of knives
An aura of evil seems to surround them
I try earnestly to regain control but to no avail
She triumphs once again
I grip the knife and remove it from its housing
The blade honed to a deadly point gleaming in the midnight moon
The creatures of the night seem to have sensed my impending doom
The tempo and volume of the sounds crescendo
They peak and then wither out to slow steady beat
The knife edges towards my wrist
Slowly I drag it across my flesh
It slides thru with ease
I feel nothing but a fleeting sense of relief
And then the pain slowly leaks Into me
The thin line of red slowly appears
And I slice my wrist yet again
And again the pain sneaks upon me
It suddenly doesn't feel so bad
The pain is like a drug
Shooting into my system
Like my special brand of drug
I'm happy
Suddenly I don't mind that the bitch is out to get me
I dare her to do it again
And that she does
Over and over again
Cutting these wounds into my skin
Mutilating my flesh
I cry in pain but also in exstacy
Blissfully sitting on the kitchen floor in my own blood
Smiling inside and out
But after awhile the pain is just not enough I look around for something else to wound myself with but I find nothing
Curse me and my cautious ways
I turn back to the knife
The source of my pleasure
I immediately have the urge to be a surgeon
I force the knife into my chest
Twisting and turning it in
Slicing my self into euphoria
I'm on cloud nine
And my subconscious suddenly doesn't want to play anymore
She sees what is about to take place and she becomes frightened
She tries to talk to me urging me to cease
But I tune her out
Continuously removing the knife and plunging it back inside of me
It feels so good
I feel like I'm on the verge of winning this war
I've regained control of my body
But I no longer wish to stop
I feel happier than I've ever felt in all my life
I see the finish line ahead and proceed with my final move
I tell the bitch I'm going to remove her from my head once and for all
She screams in terror
Frantically trying to take control
But to no avail
The pain has made me strong and my subconscious weak
I run the knife around the top of my head
The scalp has to go
But alas I'm met with my skull
My heart plunges
What can I do now
She remains within me
I search the kitchen again
I find hidden at the back of my cupboard an axe
I'm elated
She screams at me again
I slam the axe into my head
This time her screams are of pain and anguish
Every time she screams I plunge the axe further
I feel myself drifting away as if some weight was leaving my body
And I could finally sleep
I plunge it in one final time and her voice ceases
I am finally happy
It hurts so bad but the pain as well dwindles away into nothingness
I am free from her dark embrace........
 




The Truth Of The Matter Is, The Truth Does Not Matter.

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