#StoryTime December 21st, 2016
I am VERY not happy! So gather round boys and girls, children of all ages (Not really) Ya boy... gots a story ta tell! Again 😠😠😠
So anyway there I was at work. Minding my own bidness gettin shit done cause you know how I dos it right?! Anyway reach work and I am in a rare good mood so I think to myself nothing can mess up my day today... Who the HELL tell me fi tell miself that???? SMFH! Anyways #Storytime.
So I go to work and it being morning shift we have a certain set of duties to perform. So I drew the lot of making vegetables today. Im like no big deal I gots this! So there I am making vegetables got some help from the holiday workers cause you know... gotta make le paper yeah? So anyway it gets down to the end of it and I decide (as I more often do) to make a bit of coleslaw (See the header picture for you ... Slow ones). Now before continuing. Ive been making this stuff at work for a while now and NEVER has anyone told me that it was not to be done or what have you. Right???? Moving on
So there I was... making some coleslaw...... when shamus sister comes by and starts asking all these questions....Brady... whos coleslaw is that??? I look at her and calmly say "Food Court" ole greedy whale looks on again and asks... "Who gave you permission to make that?? Its not allowed." Now please stick a multitude of pins ok people.... Let me reiterate... a nuh di first time mi a mek the sittn. Dis black hole gut woman all eat it already herself (Without asking me for some mind you) and never have a problem before. Now all of a sudden she a come talk bout seh its not allowed?? Absurd! Anyway, I digress. So she walks off with another co-worker who apparently saw steam start to come from my ears as I turned back to the matter at hand. So I finished it and at this point I have yet to taste it. More on that later... Put it in the fridge to keep cool and shit and went about my day.. slightly peeved.
So I, as I said... went about my day. Made the regular sly remark here and a flirt here and there with le customers cause I'm fancy like that. Then what do you suppose happened next??? Yup! You guessed it! LUNCH TIME!!!! Ya boy shared his lunch! Clocked out!! Came BACK to the food court! Mind and stomach fiending for that coleslaw! I walk in like a boss box in hand. Stepped into the kitchen like a sir! I had my R-Kelly moment people I shit you not! I opened the fridge!!! I looked into the fridge!! Reached my hand in the fridge!! Couldn't find it in the fridge! I searched the other fridges wasn't anywhere in the kitchen! Kitchen! Kitchen!! Dammit now I'm MAD! Whe mi rass coleslaw deh!!!! I question couple staff... Non one could tell I where it was...
Apparently! She wanted to hide it from me and just waltz through without my knowledge!! Not today satan!!! Not!👏 To!👏 DAY!👏. So I put down what I was carrying and went back into the kitchen like I didnt see shit. The pan magically disappeared once more. Sneaky bitch! So I head out again making like Im doing something when In reality I went complete stalker mode. Eyes red with rage I walk back into the kitchen and I shit you not this is what I saw! This glutton was over on a table near the fryer stuffing her bulbous gut with MY BEAUTIFUL COLESLAW!!!!! She had the nerve to even offer it to someone else!!!!! (I was told this by a staff member. I was not listening I was just tuned into the sound of my slaw going doing her gaping hole) Now remember when I said I never even tasted the damn thing as yet???? Guess what never got a chance! This dog of a woman decided that it wasnt enough for her to eat directly out of the pan, she took what was left. Put it in HER lunch box and strolled out the kitchen! I might as well have snapped right there. The multitude of thoughts running through my mind at the time would give any officer the right to arrest my for premeditated murder. I was furious! You all know me though.... I have fumed for the rest of the day. Customers come telling me im not my usual self I had to tell them that I was pissed off! ANyways I have a plan for this... thing. Im going to make some more and boy I HOPE she takes it again!!!! I'm going to lace it with something and she will learn to watch herself around me from that point on. Damn cunt! SMH!
Lunch Time!
So I, as I said... went about my day. Made the regular sly remark here and a flirt here and there with le customers cause I'm fancy like that. Then what do you suppose happened next??? Yup! You guessed it! LUNCH TIME!!!! Ya boy shared his lunch! Clocked out!! Came BACK to the food court! Mind and stomach fiending for that coleslaw! I walk in like a boss box in hand. Stepped into the kitchen like a sir! I had my R-Kelly moment people I shit you not! I opened the fridge!!! I looked into the fridge!! Reached my hand in the fridge!! Couldn't find it in the fridge! I searched the other fridges wasn't anywhere in the kitchen! Kitchen! Kitchen!! Dammit now I'm MAD! Whe mi rass coleslaw deh!!!! I question couple staff... Non one could tell I where it was...
👿👿👿👿👿👿👿👿👿👿
Due to the fact that I had already clocked out I couldn't confront this old goat front at the moment about my missing slaw... so I HAD to go on lunch. So I did but to how mi did bex and mi did a sing pan di coleslaw I could not finish eating at all. Had to toss half a chicken titty... twas a sad moment for me -sheds a tear-. Anyway bex through the whole lunch hour with a slight spike in my overall temper.
Back To Work.....
So clock back in, walk in and head round to the kitchen cause you know... boss status and all. Anyway mi see the old goat a gwaan like everything fine and dandy a chat up with le kitchen staff. Im like Bitch (in my head though). Anyway mi head back round the front and start help refill the line (cant explain this right now but its the thing that does the thing...). As I am heading back into the kitchen another co-worker tells me that she has located my kryptonite in her fridge (she does production her fridge is not in the kitchen). So apparently my coleslaw has become sentient is what shes telling me cause I KNOW I left it in the kitchen. So I say aight and continue doing what I'm doing because Rhianna (get it??? Rhianna... Work Work Work?? No One??? Lames). Few minutes pass by and I am back in the kitchen again but heading out right. GUESS what I saw!!!!!!! This fat lady bastard a walk round to the kitchen as mi a step out... WITH MY DAMN COLESLAW!!!!!!!! The needle on my temper is at max and trying to break its limit!
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