Dating: The Curse Of Online Relationships


     Hello again to all you wonderful people who continually return to read the words my mind throws up on your monitors. In today's post we will be looking at "On-line Relationships". The Pros the Cons and whether or not they are destined to fail or triumph in today's society. Ready to take this journey??? Let's begin then shall we?

     So there are many people in this world today who are desperately seeking out their fairy tale ending with their one true love. However, these same people often times cannot seem to muster up the courage to actually go out into the world of the living to search. So what do they do??? They take their dating game to a digital stage. So why exactly do they choose this medium as a means of acquisition??? There are many answers that could be presented for you but these are a few that I feel are substantial.

The Good

     Most people prefer online dating to actually going out and interacting because online dating offers a better chance of getting a first date. All you have to do is simply post a reasonably attractive picture, give a brief synopsis of your life, and wait for the solicitations to pour in. A few e-mails and a telephone call or two will allow your personality to work for you a real plus. In the bar scene it's all about your looks; you don't have the luxury of putting your best picture out there because you're out there in the flesh. And if you don't physically appeal to your target objective, forget about it.
     Online Dating also in its own unique way shields you from embarrassment. It's easier to endure rejection from afar rather than have someone laugh directly in your face. FYI: my female clients claim that it‘s a must for a woman to have a terrific picture to get online attention but it's not as important for a man to have one. This makes sense in part, because men tend to be more visual.

The Bad

     As with anything that exist however, with good there has to exist bad. For starters, Online Dating makes things so much easier and faster that you can meet someone online today and a few days down the line you will be meeting face to face. This in and of itself is not necessarily bad per-say; However it is generally accepted that anything that is acquired in a rush tends to leave in that exact same way. Hence the reason a lot of people stay clear of this form of Dating. The saying "Slow and Steady wins the race" comes to mind...
     Another big flaw with Online Dating is the Human factor. Many people tend to think that because its simply Online they can omit little details or leave out huge deciding factors in their Dating profiles. Take for example a female posts a glamour shot as her profile picture. Those tend to attract a certain set of people. Lo and behold said female ends up accepting an invite for an outing with one of her suitors. When they get to the destination at the appointed time the man is left looking for his Glamour Shot Princess while she stands unbeknownst to him within his sights looking absolutely nothing like he pictured. This is generally how a Blind Date would work. The man seeing this will do one of two things; He will either Turn tail and leave the scene or he will try and make it work at least until the date is over and then cease contact. Armed with this scenario in their minds both the male and the female will come to the conclusion that Online Dating doesn't work out.

A Rare Breed

     Now say that both parties involved in this dating arrangement were both completely honest in their initial profiles. Lets be honest this would never happen in real life but for the sake of this post lets just say they were truthful. They arrange this date armed with all these details about each other and meet up at the predestined time. Now remember these two were completely open with everything on their profiles, no holds barred, when they meet up the perform all the niceties and maybe order something to eat. While waiting for their food the talk about what little they had yet to share. Once the meal has arrived they have exhausted what little conversation they would have for the evening and so they sit eating in complete silence. Staring everywhere except for their date trying to make themselves seem occupied and ignoring the awkward silence. Once they have finished eating they hurriedly leave and go their separate ways. This is known as Sharing too much too soon. The fact that you bared yourself completely to them on the Internet there is literally nothing more for them to get to know about you at that point in time and thus that date is in and of itself a bust. That is yet another reason why this form of dating is said to not work.

A Ray Of Hope

     Now although there are many reasons why it will NOT work there are some rare occasion in which it does. Both parties share just enough of themselves to intrigue the other but leaves enough off to pique their interest and leave them wanting to know more. They both have an ample amount in common with each other are fully compatible, and live within a certain distance of each other. This along with a few other things will enable them to move out of the realm of online dating and begin to "Officially Date".
     So with that said you cant completely knock Online dating, but it would be wise to know exactly what it is you're getting yourself into. Be careful with your information but at the same time don't be afraid to share a bit of yourself with the world. You wont get anywhere fast any time soon if you're too stingy with it. When you DO find someone compatible don't rush things, take it slow and feel them out. See what exactly it is that they are about. Now if you will excuse me -opens online dating website and sets up profile- I have "business" to attend to. See you next time.




Some of the information in this post was found over at http://www.psychologytoday.com

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